Where did my stamina go?

Let me begin by stating a cold hard fact.

I lost my stamina.

It used to be I could go a full 5k, easy breezy. Instead of re-living the past and focusing on what I used to be able to do, I need to have a very clear picture of where I am now and what it will take to be where I want to be.

I thought that last night I could run without my c25k running app. Oh- ho-ho no no no! I will not be doing that again. There was no structure, and nothing to focus on except for how of breath I was, and how super jiggle-y my fat was. Having the app gives me a goal, and you feel accomplished after each section of running you do, or at least I do.

Tonight, I will be doing Week 4, Day 1. Which will put me at intervals of running for 5 minutes and walking for 2 1/2 minutes and that sounds like it will push me just enough. I need to ease back into things for the sake of my knee.
I have been feeling completely drained lately. Lethargic, strange appetite, emotional and I had no idea why. I stumbled upon this article today about how there is going to be a full-moon on friday. Makes sense! I’m preparing to turn into a werewolf. just kidding… but it does explain the strange energies and emotions I am dealing with currently. I realize I might be the only crazy person that feels this way, and I am okay with that.

I also recently became attuned to practice LaHoChi, which is an energy healing modality. I think being exposed to and opening up to new energies might also have a lot to do with why I feel so off lately. After some researching I did online, It turns out this is a common occurrence when someone undergoes the ascension process, Of which I thought you could only go through once… ( I went through this last january/february). NOPE, it’s a process. And silly me, thinking I was done with it, nope… still expanding and growing in my conciousness.Thank God for that though, right? When we stop learning … we might as well be dead 😛

Hope you are all having a good week so far!

xoxox

Shana

First run completed! – week 3 day 1 starting point

Its been a couple of months in the making inside my brain, this desire to start running again brewing slow and steady. Thats a good sign though, slow and steady. Means I might actually have a long-term relationship with running.

Status report on the knee : Slightly puffier than before the run, feels a little funny, too. wobbly and sensations inside it. Knee problems are to translate into words. It’s just weird and not normal, mmkay?

Status report on muscle soreness: None. I have some sensations that indicate I might actually still have gluteus medius muscles and quadriceps! Hallelujah!

Status report on food: I had a big unhealthy coffee drink from starbucks. But I am just now realizing its time to shift my focus on the healthy things I eat, and make healthy-eatting the focus. I have been living in a place of “Oh, this is so bad for me, if I eat this… I am going to get fat…. Eating it anyway.” I need to change my thoughts about this whole thing all over again. And refocus.

At least I am feeling determined to start working out again. I have group meditation tonight. So, the run will have to wait for tomorrow!
xoxoxox

-Shana

Hello, Confidence. It’s been a while!

I am happy to finally report back to you all and say, that my absence from writing hasn’t been because of going into hiding from falling off the wagon or from not working my tail off. Believe me,  I have BEEN WORKING MY TAIL OFF!  And I am happy to report back to you with great news.

I am finally a size medium. for real!photo (2)

Here I am, in the dressing room, trying on Medium sized shorts and top.  I was so happy and amazed that I immediately started to cry the happiest of tears and then took a picture! This is a pretty huge milestone for me. And I think back to when I started, and I am really impressed with myself for sticking out this long.  Now, I need to follow this up with the obligatory… I still have work ahead of me.

Am I happy with how I look? HELL YES! For the first time in years, I can say that with full confidence. The main goal I had when I started this journey was to get my confidence back!  Here it is.

And here is a picture of the transformation thus far…

 

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I have the Keto diet, my supportive friends here, and the C25k app to thank for the progress, AND my determination to not give up. There were many moments of weakness along the way, and lots of stalls but that’s okay… that’s called life.

I have transitioned some in my diet from keto to paleo, I guess??. Still keeping it high fat and low carb, I allowed oats into my life and my current carb intake is less than 100g a day and keeping my calorie count in check.

I have started a new workout routine.  I am on week 3 of it, actually.  I have started lifting weights at the gym! This means I am no longer stepping on the scale, and I am keeping progress documented by measurements, how I feel, and by pictures. The scale was driving me crazy. It became a game of numbers instead of being healthy, making right choices and determining how I was feeling on a daily basis. The scale served its purpose in the beginning of my journey, and it kept me going on the right track.

I have lots of time on my hands now that school fell through. I have until December to really step up my game in the gym and working out.  It has helped me so much with how I feel on a chemical level, feeling great 🙂

I hope you are all doing well!

xoxox

-Shana

 

 

My 18th Week of Keto. and the 5 mile run.

Last Friday, I weighed in at 151 pounds. To celebrate this new number, I went shopping for clothes and was able to fit into and purchase a size 10!

I haven’t been a size 10 in 14 years!

To celebrate this new and exciting number I decided to spoil myself at the Cheesecake Factory.

This was the first time I have been there in 18 weeks. It was a well-deserved cheat day. BUT, this well-deserved cheat day cost me 5 pounds!

Ever since Saturday I have been working my ass off to get back down to 151.  Sunday I completely finished my C25K app! I am now on to these things called “free runs”.  which really sound awesome, don’t they? Like I can spread my wings and leave the cage, to run amuck in fields of poppies and dandelions with the wind blowing through my hair and me singing … ” the hills are alive, with the sound of muuuuuuusiiic”. Except, it’s not like that at all. It’s still hot outside, I still run on concrete/pavement and turn a bright shade of red and have sweat pouring down my face. Nothing at all like the app leads me to believe these “free runs” are made of.

Today marked my longest run yet… FIVE miles! I think I am in denial about liking running. Whenever someone tells me to enjoy my run, I scoff at them.

” Psshhh, yeah right, like I could EVER like running… Give me a break”.

And yet, I find myself going out for jogs almost everyday…  It’s either I am a masochist, or I like running, or both, but I am definitely in denial about both of those things. Hopefully I will be able to embrace these things about myself one day soon.

Pretty soon, I will be at the 150 mark. When I hit that, I will have ten more pounds to go before my next goal of 140! (this time with no trips to the cheesecake factory).

I have a FitBit now, this will most definitely help with my goals, I am sure of it.

I wont let another 2 weeks go by without updating my blog, it helps keep me accountable and to be honest, it feels like I am confiding in a friend, because outside of this, there aren’t many people who really give a damn. Even if you all don’t, which I am sure is a high likelihood. IT FEELS like you do, be it true or not, it still feels that way, and it warms my heart and keeps me going 🙂

 

 

 

Back to Keto – Changing the plans again! Week 16

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I just completed Week 9, Day  1 of the C25k.!  Only two more days of the app to go until I run 3 miles! =D I can’t believe I made it here. Looking back, I was huffing and puffing and cursing my lungs, and my excess fat. I just ran for 30 minutes without stopping!  I am proud of myself tonight.

Last post, I said I was jumping off of the keto-wagon, but as it turns out, my hives are still present even with more carbs in my diet. So, I have made the decision that I am going back to keto, but I am going to eat many more veggies, and cut down on the dairy. We’ll see how it goes. The fact is, I need to get back to keto, I need the familiarity of it. When I tried to eat noodles, I felt like I was teetering on the edge of a cliff, about to fall head first into a carb binge. Its easier to do than I thought, and thinking of gaining a bunch of weight back because of something stupid like that terrifies me!

In other great news, I might be starting school in August! Friday, the admissions department called me and told me I passed my exams with flying colors, and have enough points to secure an interview with the director of the program. I am so anxious. In order to ease my nerves about it all, I thought some retail therapy would do me some good. So, today, I went to Old Navy and bought a cute dress for the interview, I fit into a Medium size!!! Best believe I bought it, and I am going to ROCK that size medium dress 🙂 My next hurdle is the interview.

In the meantime, I am going to keep on keto’ing on, continue running and going to the gym.  my future is starting to take shape! I am feeling proud and hopeful. NEVER GIVING UP!!

 

– Shana

Guess who’s back? – Week 14, Day 3

That crazy girl than sings while she runs. Yep, in full force I started up my c25k again. It has been approximately 4 weeks since I ran last, and I started back where I left off… and I thought tonight deserved a recap, its one worth blogging about.

Week 8, Day 1

Miles ran –  2.46

Miles walked – .57

Number of terrifying toads that crossed Shana’s path – 5

Number of times that Shana screamed bloody murder when paths crossed with said terrifying toads –  5

There was a recent monsoon here a couple of days ago, which means nasty hibernating toads are awake and hopping the sidewalks and streets, and they are HUGE and slimy-looking.  I have an unnatural fear of things that slither and crawl. My biggest fear is of snakes, like frozen in fear scared.

Regardless, I ran for 28 minutes, even if I was a wee-bit jumpy and on edge, I got it done. It was a little hot outside in the 90’s at 9pm. If I decide to continue this crazy behavior, I might need to consider buying of those “cooling towels”.

Tomorrow, I hit the gym in the morning! =D

 

I hope you all have had a great Wednesday! Thank you for taking the time to read my blog, and for sharing this important time in my life with me. If it weren’t for me seeing my followers grow a bit each day, I doubt this experience would have been as special as it has been these past 4 months 🙂 I am so grateful.

See you all tomorrow, Goodnight ❤

– Shana

Dusting off – Week 14, Day 2

 

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I am making a promise to myself that no matter how hard things get, that I will still keep up the fight to achieve my goals. I am also promising that when I fall down, I wont stay down. I will be getting back up and dusting myself off.

Last post I caught myself negative talking, and my life has NO ROOM for that kind of negativity anymore! I systematically cut negativity from my life, like surgery.


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The reasons why I was negative thinking yesterday is because I am fearful of whats unknown. I am going to use this opportunity to tackle my fear head on.  I will study up on math, I have a great memory (thanks keto) and I will be my bravest. In fact, from now on, when I see an opportunity to  be social, I am going to be. The time to change is now.

In other news, I went to the gym this afternoon! I am so happy! I thought that my butt would be handed to me, and that my stamina would have suffered from the month off and that wasn’t the case. I am learning what my body and mind need, and I need the gym for both of them.

I have a bit of keto knowledge for those that read and follow the diet …. Atkins bars need to be a very seldom treat, NOT once a day. At least for me, I have found that getting back into keto and eating them daily just wasnt really happening for me.  Must be the sugar alcohols? I don’t know.

I am dusting myself off, getting back in the saddle and getting my focus back. No more days off of the gym, and my diet is getting back into its comfortable place of staying on track. With my diet and exercise getting in sync with how they were it gives me some solace that I can tackle other things. Feeling less overwhelmed and more focused, getting my groove back!!  Feels good and its about time!

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Goodnight friends! I will be back tomorrow 🙂

“Sometimes adversity is what you need to face in order to become successful” -Zig Ziglar

xoxo – Shana